The thought of who I want to be, the kind of person I want to be, the type of mom, wife, friend, Christian has been on my mind a lot lately. For years I have considered the type of wife, mom, friend, Christian I should be. There is a difference.
Considering who I should be comes from guilt, or less vile sounding from a sense of responsability, and sometimes just as harsh, a sense of expectation. Shoulds are hard to live up to and when failure to meet up to should comes it leaves a bitter taste and a long memory. Shoulds oppress and force by fear of failure, resignation and emptiness.
Today I am taking time purposely to think about who I want to be.
I want to be organized and to live in a tidy home. Even typing that made me smile. Being a sentimental, things bring back memories, book addict woman means I gather clutter almost as fast as I give it away. Living in a home with four others who are themselves clutter getters, some senitimental over things (of course not the same ones I am which means theirs are silly ha ha) means organization and tidiness are on the edge of what we live in.
I want to have an open heart and open home where friends new and old love to gather and know they are welcome. I want to think of others before myself and without envy. To be content with where we are, what we have, and how we are doing without comparing to anyone else to judge exactly how good I have it.
When my girls are grown and gone it would please me for them to look back and think they had a fantastic childhood in a warm and loving home. That they not only thrived but enjoyed our homeschooling adventures. There is so much I long to give them and offer them and it is a struggle to not let the frustration, disappointment and even anger at our inability to do so overtake me.
When people think of me I'd like for them to see someone who is different in a good way. Someone who is happy, thankful, peaceful and different. I'd like to tame my tongue. To be strong enough to hold back the sarcasm, the negative, the biting words that bring a laugh at someone else's expense. I'd like to build people up and never participate in tearing them down. I'd like to be the one others know they can trust.
I started this morning reading Ephesians 3, 4 and 5. I planned to read 4 when I sat in my chair but found myself flipping back to 3 to start and then continuing on to 5. How then shall we live? seems to be the question Paul is answering. I'm going to continue reading those chapters this week and think about them. There are too many verses to quote all the ones that caught my attention but I want to share the one that originally did a week ago.
Ephesians 4:1 As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. *emphasis mine* Wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, co-worker, woman of God. This is the calling I have received. Homeschooling our children this is the calling I have received. Am I living a life worthy of such?
Showing posts with label homeschooling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label homeschooling. Show all posts
Monday, July 11, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Cookies, Homeschooling And Doing The Right Thing.
My goal for this year is to quit quitting, and it's also to say "Yes" more when my girls ask to do something. It's much easier to say, "No, not right now." and then never say yes to whatever they asked. This is our second school day post my second homeschool convention of the year. I came home looking forward to finding a way to implement what I'd learned and what had been reaffirmed for me as true. And as much as those two things seem like separate things, they aren't. Because most of what is in my life is connected. Homeschooling is not a separate part of our family life but our family life is an integral part of homeschooling. I guess you could say our life is our education.
So what did I learn? Well, I learned, again (I'm slow to learn sometimes!) that music is an important part of brain development and that reading aloud, both listening and doing, help to improve language skills long after the story is over. That reading above ability level is a GOOD thing. Also, that reading aloud, being read to I mean, is the favorite part of many peoples memories of school.
So at the moment my middle child is working chocolate chip cookies. The second sheet is in the oven right now. She asked me nicely and I didn't really want to help, but I said yes anyway and helped her do it. My youngest is playing at the table, but she's listening to an audio book, thanks to Audibles.com. LOVE that site! It's not a highly intellectual book, it's a Boxcar Children story. But it is higher than her reading level and both girls enjoy it. Yesterday they worked on crafts while listening to Classical Music and I plan to do it again this afternoon. I'm still thinking about what book I want us to read outloud as a family. The last one we read was The Swiss Family Robinson.
The girls have been asking about doing a food drive again too. And today the middle one asked again and today I said yes. So I sent an e-mail out to our non-group group of local homeschooling friends who like to do the food drive together and hopefully next week we will be doing this again. We go on Wednesday afternoon or so and tuck flyers into mailboxes and door handles letting people know that we have a Super Simple way for them to give to the foodbank. We know people often mean to give and just forget or don't because they don't have time. So we offer to pick up a bag of food from them and take it for them. We come back on Friday morning and if there's a bag on the porch, step, etc we'll deliver it to the food bank. It's a lot of fun to do, and feels good to be helping!
It's not always easy to do the right thing, to say yes when I'd rather just sit. To say no, when it'd be easier to say yes for things like going to play instead of doing work. The best things in life aren't free is the way I've heard that saying but it's my opinion that the best things in life aren't easy. They take work. Children who are polite, fun to be around, and considerate of others don't just happen. Learning to speak a new language. Homemade breads. Those things are all wonderful and all take work! Mistakes happen but what makes the difference between failure and success is simple, it's not quitting. It's being consistent, even if that means starting again a hundred times. It's trying again. It's daily persevering because what you want to do is a good thing and well worth the effort.
Where's this going you ask? Here. My daughter won't learn to make cookies on her own without a recipe until she's made them using the recipe so many times she has it memorized and that won't happen unless I say yes and help her for as long as she needs and wants help. The girls will learn what they need to learn academically as we continue to read good books, work on their math etc. but that is just a noisy gong or a pretty apple with worms if they don't have character that honors and glorifies God as adults. The world needs more truly good people who exhibit integrity, honor, strength and intelligence paired with the ability to think, not simply follow the crowd.
This afternoon I made a batch of homemade rolls. My girls made cookies. We're going to listen to some classical music while we read about God and think about and then discuss what we've read. I'd like to play on the computer all afternoon and just let the day slip away, but that's not the right thing and in the end doing the right thing one small thing at a time will add up to a life well lived.
So what did I learn? Well, I learned, again (I'm slow to learn sometimes!) that music is an important part of brain development and that reading aloud, both listening and doing, help to improve language skills long after the story is over. That reading above ability level is a GOOD thing. Also, that reading aloud, being read to I mean, is the favorite part of many peoples memories of school.
So at the moment my middle child is working chocolate chip cookies. The second sheet is in the oven right now. She asked me nicely and I didn't really want to help, but I said yes anyway and helped her do it. My youngest is playing at the table, but she's listening to an audio book, thanks to Audibles.com. LOVE that site! It's not a highly intellectual book, it's a Boxcar Children story. But it is higher than her reading level and both girls enjoy it. Yesterday they worked on crafts while listening to Classical Music and I plan to do it again this afternoon. I'm still thinking about what book I want us to read outloud as a family. The last one we read was The Swiss Family Robinson.
The girls have been asking about doing a food drive again too. And today the middle one asked again and today I said yes. So I sent an e-mail out to our non-group group of local homeschooling friends who like to do the food drive together and hopefully next week we will be doing this again. We go on Wednesday afternoon or so and tuck flyers into mailboxes and door handles letting people know that we have a Super Simple way for them to give to the foodbank. We know people often mean to give and just forget or don't because they don't have time. So we offer to pick up a bag of food from them and take it for them. We come back on Friday morning and if there's a bag on the porch, step, etc we'll deliver it to the food bank. It's a lot of fun to do, and feels good to be helping!
It's not always easy to do the right thing, to say yes when I'd rather just sit. To say no, when it'd be easier to say yes for things like going to play instead of doing work. The best things in life aren't free is the way I've heard that saying but it's my opinion that the best things in life aren't easy. They take work. Children who are polite, fun to be around, and considerate of others don't just happen. Learning to speak a new language. Homemade breads. Those things are all wonderful and all take work! Mistakes happen but what makes the difference between failure and success is simple, it's not quitting. It's being consistent, even if that means starting again a hundred times. It's trying again. It's daily persevering because what you want to do is a good thing and well worth the effort.
Where's this going you ask? Here. My daughter won't learn to make cookies on her own without a recipe until she's made them using the recipe so many times she has it memorized and that won't happen unless I say yes and help her for as long as she needs and wants help. The girls will learn what they need to learn academically as we continue to read good books, work on their math etc. but that is just a noisy gong or a pretty apple with worms if they don't have character that honors and glorifies God as adults. The world needs more truly good people who exhibit integrity, honor, strength and intelligence paired with the ability to think, not simply follow the crowd.
This afternoon I made a batch of homemade rolls. My girls made cookies. We're going to listen to some classical music while we read about God and think about and then discuss what we've read. I'd like to play on the computer all afternoon and just let the day slip away, but that's not the right thing and in the end doing the right thing one small thing at a time will add up to a life well lived.
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