I Get Knocked Down

     But I get up again, you ain't never gonna keep me down. Isn't that how the song goes?  I actually prefer Toby Mac's Get Back Up.  We lose our way but we get back up again.  May be knocked down but not out forever. This is love callin' out to the broken. 

     Call me broken.  Call me longing for what I used to have.  No matter how far my heart may have wandered, no matter how long it's been since I paid attention.   It's never too late to get back up again. 

    Toby Mac is a man of God and anyone who thinks differently hasn't really read his lyrics or listened to the songs the man sings.  His song Hold On is reaffirming God's love and faithfulness.  It reaches my heart. 
His cd Tonight is one of my all time favorites.  And now back to our regularly scheduled blog.

     Tim and I are doing the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University Home kit.  Last night we watched week 3.  This is a big week.  It's the week we work on the cash flow plan.  That is a nice name for Budget.  I really do like it better. Instead of a budget being something telling me what I have to do a Cash Flow  Plan is me telling my money where to go and what to do.  I like that. I'm bossy like that.  One of the outstanding notes of the night was his continued emphasis on keep trying, keep working on it, it's not going to work the first time perfectly. 

     That idea of not expecting perfection the first time is a concept that I need to apply to most areas in my life.  Instead of giving up before I start because I can't do it the first time (lazy?), try and keep working at it, it's worth it.  Constant correction, that's what Andy Stanley said.  It's going to take constant correction, and Mr. Ramsey just emphasized that again.

 In about 90 days you'll start getting the hang of it. Three MONTHS to get it right?! Are you kidding?!?!  Ok.  Taking a deep breath I've already done it sort of for the last couple.  This month still counts as month one, but hey, I've already had some practice, that's a good thing!  Then he said that even then it's going to need doing every month.  I could feel a chill go up my spine. Every month, forever?  Uh, I'm not good at forever like that.  There are only two things I've done long term, love my husband and stay married to him, and love my kids. LOL  Nope, that's not three, that's two. 

I've been given the tools to do this well.  I've got the dvd series, the workbooks, the support of good friends, and even the online tools from Mr. Ramsey for 91 days, which is the length of the FPU class.  I've got the tools to do other things well also. I've got the Bible.  I've got school curriculum.  I've got friends and spousal support. 

I didn't get this far from God, this far from faith in a week.  I'm not going to get back in a week.  It was deliberate steps that took me away, my decisions to not read His word, to not pray.  It's going to take little decisions to get back.  Reading the Bible daily and thinking on it, not just reading it to check it off my list.  Praying for my children daily the way I always wanted to, why on earth did I stop?! 

I know perfectly well we can't cover a years curriculum in a month, but it's laid out intentionally to cover it in a year.  If we do a day at a time, week after week we will conquer it and the girls WILL have an excellent education.  Lesson by lesson, day by day, month after month will turn into school year after school year.  I can do this and do it well. 

I'm not even going to tackle my health right now. I'm babystepping in a few areas already and need to keep my balance.  Put too much before me and I crumple.   As my heart turns back towards God and I babystep towards Him I'm going to have faith that the other areas in my life will follow.

Jumping In

I'm really  not a sit around and wait for things to change kind of girl.  I'm more of a think of something and then DO IT.  Sometimes something occurs to me and I think, "I want to _____" but I don't do it right away, then all of the sudden something clicks and I just do it. 

Today I have been fighting feeling blue all day.  Same as yesterday.  I know it's hormonal but it's still a fight.  I've cleaned things I've wanted to be cleaned. Like the top of the fridge.  And the counter.  I hate having every inch covered with something, it's driving me nuts.  So I found room in the cupboards for the containers and emptied expired vitamin bottles to make room for cereal and ta'da! more counter space.  I wanted to clear the top of the pantry cupboard.  It's not clear but it is tidy and I'm satisfied for the moment.  I rearranged the pictures of the fridge ditching ones that were o-l-d.  Throwing out magnets to things I have no interest in.  It looks much nicer now.

And then I saw a friends post about concluding leading Financial Peace University.  Tim and I had talked about hosting one a year or more ago.  We talked about it but never did it.  I didn't request the info because A. my house was messy and did I really want to invite strangers in?  B. When on earth could we do it? Most are done weeknights.  C. there is no "c" those are the reasons.  So today I went on the website and requested information.  I didn't commit us to anything, just asked for info about leading it.  Then I called Tim and made sure that was ok.  As usual he's fine with it, since I didn't commit.  We'll look over the info together and then decide if it will work.  I think it will.

I've Dave Ramsey's books.  Living it is what I suck at.  Choosing to do it, it's HARD.  Harder than anything else other than losing weight.  It's equal to that, imo.  So possibly this October we will open our home, something I actually really enjoy doing, and host a Financial Peace University class.  We'll see, as Tim likes to say. 

So it's the middle of the day.  I've had coffee, ibuprofen, cold medicine, and chocolate and my spirits are up a bit.  I'm diving in!