I take my job as Wife and Mom very seriously. I study how to do better with this job, striving to learn how to be the best Mom and Wife I can be. Sometimes I come across something in my studying that hits me in the heart, or square between the eyes, and sometimes it comes a sucker punch to the stomach. I encountered all three today.
If you are a Wife and/or a Mom check out www.avirtuouswoman.org. A couple of days ago I got a facebook message about this and decided to check it out. I read day 2, then day 3. Today I started with day 1. One, two, punches landed. I'm knocked to my knees. I read day 4. I'm hit in the heart, then between the eyes and then in the stomach as I go down for the count. Down again to my knees and on my face before God begging for forgiveness and asking Him to please deliver me from these sins.
As with all things this isn't out of the blue. God seems to know I'm a little slow on the uptake with some things. I need to hear them again and again before I wake up and go "OH! You're talking to ME about that!" So the girls and I have been reading through Proverbs for a few months, one a day according to the date. Multiple times in the last six months I've read about a foolish wife who tears down her home with her own hands. I've read about the wife who's husband can safely trust in her. I've longed to be that wife and yet I know, I'm not. My desire and my actions have not agreed.
I pray that this is a turning point for me and not yet another brief moment of clarity that I soon obscure with my stronger desire to please me. Now, it's time for me to feed our children, continue to care for them and to work on our home so it is truly a safe haven for Tim to be. I have an amazing husband, I pray God will continue to teach me how to be an amazing wife.